Tuesday, November 27, 2012

Starting Life Afresh

It's the New Muslim Calendar Year. And praise to the Almighty, I have made several little improvements in my habits, and my living space.

To improve quality of life, yourself, your family, your friends and acquaintances.

Life must begin with a pure intention, followed by systematic means of achieving that goal.

Live on the foundation of truth and seek the best path. Each individual is born with a mission and so do it well.

A quote from my late teacher,

Be like the bees, work hard to make honey, something useful for everyone.

Points to think about:

How can I make my days more fruitful?
How do I inject more meaningful task in my family's daily activities?
How do I make my parents happy in the long run? What can I plan for them?
How do I contribute to the community with the skills that I have?

I believe there is something I must do before I grow older. So let's not waste the precious time. Be 'that' person now. The best of what you are!

Monday, November 19, 2012

Don't Let Others Judge Your Work Life Balance

I am more convinced now that we should be more in control of the decisions we make in our lives. Knowing that we are the product of our thoughts and actions. If we enjoy what we are doing and are finding happiness in it, even if others don't see it that way, then we should be confident and carry on, bearing in mind that the end of our actions will be good. "It is through happiness that we will achieve success. Before going to bed each night, try thinking of at least two things that made you happy that day." I quoted from Lisa Quast's article on work-life balance. I guess if we really practise this each day, we will be living in gratitude, and will have a heightened awareness of the things that matter to our success. Don't be a slave to a jumbled mess of thoughts and comments. Stick to the values you believe in, and aim to improve the quality of life - for yourself and others. Discard unhappiness from your memory space, and treat it as moments that have made you stronger inside. Forgive every soul that has ever hurt you. Happiness will come as you drift into the slumberland of peace.

Friday, November 16, 2012

Being An Introvert Is Good Too

Watch this TED presentation to find out why being an introvert has many advantages and why the society needs to accomodate to introverts. http://www.ted.com/talks/susan_cain_the_power_of_introverts.html?fb_ref=talk

Friday, November 09, 2012

Becoming the Best Singapore Working Mums, Tips on Negotiating for Flexi Work

Becoming the Best Singapore Working Mums, Tips on Negotiating for Flexi Work,  Singapore Motherhood -
from Yesterday's Mums@Work Event: Can Women Have It All? Successful Work-Life Balance Book Launch by Sher-li Torrey and Ruth Wong
Define and decide your priorities. Only you can decide.
Me: I am a little indecisive. It's time I sit down with pen and paper and get down to a decision.

What is balance for you? Some jobs make it difficult to balance work and life. Be aware of that, and find ways to overcome that.
Me: I am thankful that my job has been pretty kind to me.

The busiest mothers are the best mothers.
Me: Yes, I agree, but as a busy mother, I often neglect myself.

What is important for me to be sane? Some things are unnegotiable. So decide on what you want.
Me: I was just reading an article on jobs with the most and the least psychopath. I am glad I don't belong the extreme psychopath group.

Help other mothers to be the best that they can be.
Me: This is a wake-up call for me. I must also help others, not only myself.

Having a supportive network - your in-laws, your helper -  is important.
Me: Thankful that they have been very kind and understanding, and nothing can repay their kindness.

Enjoy the journey - don't keep looking for the balance. Age will tell, as you learn to recognise the conflicts.
Me: I have yet to master the skill of enjoying the journey. Perhaps age will tell, as mentioned.

Let go - you don't have to fulfill all your priorities. It's OK.
Me: Letting go sometimes involve a job half-done or mission not accomplished, and I hate that. But for the sake of keeping my sanity, I will.

Cut some slack, life doesn't revolve around just your kids. You have to also give attention to your husband, your other family members and yourself too.
Me: I will plan more this time, so that I can make time for all the other important people in my life.

Conduct a thorough interview when getting helpers. Because they are the ones who will be looking after our kids.
Me: I am guilty of getting a helper instantly and end up being disappointed with her antics. Will surely pay more attention to the selection process this time.

Parenthood is a shared responsibility between mum AND dad.
Me: Agreed. Hello Mr, are you listening?

Is there a way the government can not make mothers have to decide between work and family?
Me: I shan't say more.

Have the leadership principle - Make the first step e.g. get extra help, negotiate with your boss.
Me: I am a self-starter,  thanks to the type A personality that God has given me.

Know your strength, match it to your business and then do a balance sheet.
Me: My strength is creative and emphatic. Well, I have decided on my business niche, and am still in research phase. Just to launch it in a proper way.

Think about how to make the marriage sustainable.
Me: Another imporant aspect I agree.

Do it, then evaluate. Plan, and you will get better.

Push the envelope and create a win-win kind mindset. You have to see from both sides (Employer vs employee)
Me: Don't shortchange your employer or even anyone else. Always give more than you receive.

Convince your employer that face-time is not as important as your work output. This will take time, as you build the confidence in your employer.
Me: I can produce good work output sometimes at home too. It doesn't matter where you are, as long as you are sincere and disciplined in your work.

Have professionalism in what you say to your boss, when you negotiate. 
Me: I have gone through that phase, it was nerve-wrecking, but it's worth taking the plunge.

Flexi work is not about shortened work hours, but it is just about not working 8 hours in a capitalist order.
Me: I second this.

Final words from the experts:
Listen to your heart.
List and then compare at the end of the day.
It's alright if you can't find the balance. Use the pockets of time you have.
Ask for help when you need it.